How Your Families Mood Could Affect The Flu Shot

On most families to-do lists this time of year is to get an appointment made for the flu shot. Some worry till it is done, others resist it as long as possible, because the thought of a shot just makes them shutter. Making sure to be as positive as you can be can almost feel like a daunting task in an exam room, not many really like having to be at a doctors office. Though your mood could very well give a boost to the flu vaccine. New studies, published just last month, gave some insight on how the connection between our thinking and our bodies does have an effect on how the body reacts to the vaccine.

Can walking into the doctor’s office in a less stressed and worried mood really make a difference? To some degree, yes, according to researchers in the UK.  A greater positive mood during the vaccine, and even after receiving it, did contribute to “greater antibody responses to influenza vaccination”. It was mentioned that it did make a difference in the small study, causing more awareness to the fact that psychological or behavioral factors could definitely contribute to physical health. Getting a shot may not be the number one thing to be happy about, but if you want to fight off the nasty flu best you can this year, being positive could definitely help! (Now this does not mean being in a good mood will guarantee no flu, there are different strains of the virus and many other factors that contribute as well. The study has proven the better the mood the better the antibodies react.)

“Patient behaviors and psychological well-being can influence immune responses to vaccination. Physical activity, nutrition, sleep, stress, and mood have all been identified as ‘immune modulators’ sufficient to impact on vaccination responses.”

Encouragement of better understanding and mindfulness really could play a role in the overall health of mom, dad, and kids. But, when the kids hear the word “shots”, anxiety is all they are feeling!  There are alternatives other than the doctor’s office that could help eliminate the scary factor, many pharmacies (Walgreens, Rite Aid, CVS, Walmart) do provide vaccine services. These may be more convenient for your family and provide a less intimidating environment. And instead of just wishful thinking, in turning around such an experience, here are some cool helpful professional tips to try for your child’s next vaccination visit:

  • Talk about and focus on a treat for after the Dr.s visit, doing this helps refocus your child’s attention to the event after, instead of just focusing on the visit.
  • As a parent, calm yourself to eliminate anxiety. Per research tips in reducing pain, a parents reaction could increase a child’s pain.
  • For little ones, be mindful to hold your child more like a hug, to eliminate them feeling like they are being restrained.
  • For kindergarten to middle school-aged children, it has been suggested to try the “cough trick”. Coughing once before and during the vaccination can help minimize pain reaction.
  • A most popular one is a distraction, immediately after finding an activity to distract like a toy, stuffed animal or handheld electronic device can also help!

inspirational-quote-on-changing-the-world
Photo via: allthatisinteresting.com
For my teenage step-daughter, it made a world of a difference having wonderful nurses that not only made her laugh but feel comfortable. A simple hug and a few laughs, made her last shot a little less of a traumatic experience for her! And with these new research findings, may very well have benefited her body’s reaction to the vaccine. Something stressful and even scary at times can be made into a more positive experience for not just our children, but for us parents as well. I personally find these new health discoveries fascinating and such a great factor into the importance of incorporating healthy thinking habits within the family. The benefits are worth the hard work. What are your families techniques in lessening the anxiety of a doctors visit?

 

Cover Photo via Bon Secours Good Health Blog

Advertisements

Roots


A personal prose poem for the weekend! 

Sometimes it truly is our roots that we never forget and some days memories hold us there, other times we are gifted with familiar surroundings and old friends/family that have been in your life for decades now. The beauty of life is the constant growth and building extended branches into new places full of warm new faces. Let life take you on its journey and always know what has made you who you are will never change despite it, it only adds to your experience.

Could Forbes “5 Ways To Stop Resenting Other People’s Success” Bring Out More Awareness In Society?

Today’s society is wrought with bad news on top of, more bad news. The recent Las Vegas shooting and many more instances of the abuse of violence as well as resentment towards one another or a group of people, has become overwhelming. Could the common traits in resentment of other people’s success be part of a huge social problem? Forbes “5 Ways To Stop Resenting Other People’s Success” by Psychotherapist Amy Morin, author of the book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do gives basic steps to becoming more mindful of recognizing what negative habits can drain mental strength and how to work on them. There can be even more implications brought out from this insight, like: Can there be a balance between other people’s success and ours? Can more positive mindfulness create better support towards one another and promote motivational effort in what we do? Most importantly, the minimizing of the need to compare, as mentioned by Amy Morin, could bring about an awareness essential to not just a business or personal environment, but for society as a whole.

“It’s easy to look at social media and think, “My family doesn’t have that much fun together,” or “My house isn’t nearly as nice as my friends’ homes.”

But life isn’t meant to be a competition. Drawing comparisons between yourself and other people is like comparing apples and oranges. Your journey is unique and it’s important to honor your individuality.”

Why An Automatic Negative Response?

When something good happens to another person, or someone is excited to share an accomplishment they have been working towards, sometimes there is just a defense mechanism that outwardly doesn’t show true support and inwardly thwarts personal growth. This can be from observing past mistakes of another person and holding on to them or simply feeling self-inadequate and projecting it onto others. Resentment means the feeling of displeasure or indignation at some act, remark, person, etc. Feeling displeasure in seeing another person succeed, ultimately starts from something deeper than just what that person has accomplished. If self-understanding or self-confidence is rather low, it makes sense to automatically feel depressed on how others succeed. And if peoples mistakes are the first thing that pops into the mind when a success is made, that still extends from the personal feelings of oneself.

  • A new study suggests that perspective-training can lead to a more positive observation of others instead of an automatic negative one. Know thy self to understand others suggests that the more we work on understanding ourselves first, the better we become in understanding others. Low self-confidence can turn into feeling better about yourself and feeling the happiness for other people. Past mistakes can turn into accepting change and showing understanding to the fact that all people make mistakes.

“people can be guided to develop a better inner awareness about their own mental states, and to have a better understanding of the mental state of others. This is because the better people understand themselves, the more easily they can think themselves in other people’s shoes. Such training therefore ultimately helps us deal with current global challenges, says Anne Böckler of the Max Planck Institute for Human Cognitive and Brain Science and Julius Maximilians University Würzburg in Germany.”

600_452503507.jpeg
Photo via meetup.com

Where Should Understanding Begin?

The best place to implement the very idea of deep understanding is in our homes and family life. Good and positive experiences of the ones closest to us can be encouraging and motivate a person towards accomplishments. If the good a person is trying to work on, for either themselves or their family, is not genuinely supported, then the act of resentment finds a place to breed and the motivation meant to be shared is completely moot. Everyone has a natural need to share a good experience, can it not be made into an example that others can achieve the same positive outcome?

  • For a better ‘I’, there needs to be a supportive ‘we’ via Science Daily gives attention to how productive a person can be when there is true support backing them. Take what a friend or family member is able to do, despite their own situation, and let it move you to see that you can achieve the same accomplishments. By doing so, all within a family can learn to start with bettering themselves and in time recognize their own potential. When that potential can be noticed in us, we can then learn to see the potential in others and pass on that supportive nature.

“People who reported their relationships to be supportive had a greater willingness to grow personally and felt more self-confident,”

Motivation in Mindfulness

If the recognition of becoming more self-aware and in-tune with empathy makes for a better approach towards interpersonal challenges, then could it not be a possible motivator to social betterment? Improving yourself means taking a step back from the automatic judgments and getting a wider perspective. 5 Ways To Stop Resenting Other People’s Success clearly advises:

“Sometimes, it’s tempting to make generalizations based on what we think is fair in life. She didn’t deserve that raise because she doesn’t work as hard as I do. He doesn’t deserve to have a successful business when he treats his employees like dirt.

The truth is, life isn’t always going to be fair—at least not in the way you view fairness. Insisting you deserve more and someone else deserves less wastes your time and energy. Accept the things you can’t control and focus on being the best version of yourself, without keeping score.”

When a person learns to focus on the more important things in life, including striving for a healthier self, what another person does no longer is a threat to one’s ego. Having a backing into improving personal habits and thinking can bring a balance into the world. What we see others achieve, we can take and learn from. And what we achieve can become a motivator for someone else, all in some way working on awareness.

Quotefancy-2415197-3840x2160

Finding ways to personally stop resentment can be a small way to reduce the negative effects in the world today. Admittedly, there are far more complicated and deep things that cause plenty of social resentment and problems. If we can take self-awareness and turn around a personal environment, the same awareness could help cause less negativity towards others. Seeing another person or a group of people do good or accomplish something doesn’t have to be made into something negative. Stopping resentment could truly go beyond the workplace and home, building more understanding into today’s society. Opinion is a choice of free will, but the input of bettering ourselves can bring mindfully less harsh ones. And the less harsh we all become, the less resentment there can be. What are your thoughts on how resentment affects the world today and do you agree that self-awareness could encourage better understanding towards others?

“We combat envy by cultivating genuine humility and modesty, which enables us to appreciate and value the abilities and good qualities of others”- Keys to a Happy Life

A Change Of Mindset

Life is beyond the hopes and dreams we gather through the years, disappointment beckons  the world of pain to visit and sometimes haunt our very presence. The motivation to grab hold of something better easily dissipates into the mundane day to day life, where defeat becomes a friend we are just use to being comfortable with. And while we are trudging along, feeling downhearted and tired there are life lessons we all gain and share in different ways. Maybe it is the strength we see in others that helps us along, or the belief in something greater existing to guide us when we are weak. No matter the hopelessness we strive for hope.

Most people, without being self aware, are enduring continuously through life. They keep going through a painful experience, pushing forward despite bearing the weight of the world. That part of a person is true inner strength, perseverance and capability; qualities you and I have that we can build upon. Recognize and accept that you keep going despite adversity, that you love despite heartbreak and that you have a beating heart, can take a breath and live despite pain. Take a moment to soak that in…

IMG_2546
Personal photo and quote, taken and edited by me.

It wasn’t till I became a mother that I grabbed onto the notion that thinking better could make me feel better and create a stronger person for my child to look up to. Now, I am not a certified life coach nor do I have any degrees in Psychology or Social Services. My personal goal in writing is that there are life lessons worth sharing in unique ways. I have managed to grow from depression, anxiety and sickening grief. Pain was no stranger in my life, yet I always kept going, kept living. To recognize that there was still good inside myself and that I had the power to see positive instead of only focusing on the hurt, was a great stepping stone into a better me. Life is hard and complicated, I owe teaching every bit of healthy coping skills and knowledge I have gained to my daughter and family.

We all have endurance, but we can choose to be positive in that endurance. Convert the hardest trial into seeing an end goal, a hopeful look! We can carry a measure of power to do so. Working on the thought process can change an entire outlook in life; the body can heal it self from cuts and bruises, can the mind not do the same with what we choose to think? If I have overcome negative thinking and feeling defeated, others can too!

“A joyful heart is good medicine.” – Proverbs 17:22

This is the inspiration to my writing, what motivates me to delve into the research of Psychology and thinking habits, the abilities we truly have within ourselves. Everything we talk ourselves out of or make ourselves believe plays a big role in healthy living. It can even affect our physical health! My next in depth write will be based on a news article on that very subject. Look for it by the end of the week! It will be through my Creators.co platform, which you can also access via my blog menu.

*Cover photo via 121clicks.com

5 Resources To Mindfully Recharge And Find The Positive In Your Life

Life does not make it easy to be a positive person, living is full of raw heartfelt feeling- from the most elated and exciting experiences to the deepest and darkest pain. I use to hold pain as if it was a weight hidden behind my rib cage, always aching and slowly suffocating. I have found a freedom beyond that hurt and it is the very thing I wish to focus on, for we all go through many difficulties in life and deserve to finally grab hold of the fresh air and beautiful light still existent in our lives!

As a busy mom, wife and growing as a step-mother, daily living can become very stressful. School days end with frustrated kids and a toddler finding their way to the terrible two’s is exhausting! Throw in several bad work days for daddy on top of it and the environment feels more tense than we all would like it to be. Being positive is not the first thing to focus on nor is it the easiest to accomplish. With many years of knowing what it feels like to allow things to weigh you down almost to nothing and wanting better than that for my own child and step-kids, I have personally learned to grab hold of mindfulness in times of distress. So much of what builds strength, character and coping skills comes from inside each of us, it has now become the most important thing to work on modeling coping skills and healthy thinking habits for my family!

image

Some may assume that being positive alludes you from feeling all other emotions that help you to appreciate happiness. But, being realistically positive does not mean you do not or cannot feel sadness, anger, grief or frustration. We all are human and we all will feel the effect of pain no matter how hard we try not to. Taking a step back, meditating or re-evaluating, and focusing on the good can create a positive attitude towards a negative circumstance! Here are five resources to share and what I personally do to build positive thinking within my family:

1. Gratefulness

Looking at something in a more grateful way (appreciating the good and the opportunities that are realistically there) opens the door into taking a look at the bigger picture instead of the one negative thing we are focused on.

image
Via pastortyrus.com

I am always trying to remind myself and the family of the things we still have in our lives that are good and meaningful, shifting a disappointment towards being grateful.

“people who feel gratitude are less likely to be depressed and worried, and more likely to feel satisfied with their lives.”

2. Thinking and Thoughts

The greatest thing I have observed, in all the psychology and professional research into my writing, is how our personal thinking projects itself into our own reality. We can make ourselves believe the worst or prove to our self the ability to see past a negative experience.  It truly makes a difference for me to redirect personal thoughts and focus on bettering my mood for the family. I try my very best to give an alternate perspective when someone in the family is stuck on very negative feelings and thoughts, in time hoping to motivate everyone’s ability to focus more positively and clearly while making their environment feel less tense and stressful by doing so.

3. Refraining from Negative Remarks 

Lasting change comes from what we choose to think, say and do from day to day. We can use these abilities to break each other down or build each other up. Nothing unnerves me more than to hear anyone in the family speak negatively about someone else (friend or family) or use unkind language causally without thinking. We all bear enough unkindness out in the world and carry our own flaws and mistakes, so I am continually encouraging more kindness towards one another in the home and towards others.

“not to shine such a spotlight on a difficult situation that everything good fades out.”

4. Spiritual or Mindful Routine

This is what pulls everything together to build a more positive mindset. We are a christian family, incorporating bible reading and meditating into our daily lives truly brings better thoughts, words and actions into the home. Having my own personal study time also refreshes my mindset and encourages more effort on my part to be the best example I can be for my family. For those less into the spiritual aspect, mindfulness can be a great alternative to incorporate more balance in daily life.

5. Learn Not to Take Things So Serious

I am a sucker for taking things seriously at times and getting overly anxious in some situations. But one thing I have managed to recognize is to take it easy from day to day knowing each day has its own anxiety. When the toddler won’t nap or the house is still a mess because of it, I have to take it as it is and not fret. I encourage the same for everyone else in the family. Seeing how stressed they are at times, helps me to keep working on my stress levels in order for everyone to not take things so seriously sometimes.

Those are just a few of the weekly and daily habits I am working on and trying to encourage. Taking a bad stressful day and learning to turn it around I feel is such a great asset for anyone looking to improve themselves and their family. imageIt isn’t easy, far from simple and can feel overwhelming to turn a negative mindset around, the key has been perseverance! Build up those around you by picking out the advantage to a disadvantage, speak up-building things to feel less hurt by that rude person, notice your strengths in a difficult situation, shrug off the insignificant little things to feel less worried, be grateful for what you still have in your life despite a loss. All those thought adjustments can make a huge difference in daily life!  If I can experience a difference in myself and my environment from how I choose to think and look at things, I will always continue sharing that knowledge. I hope everyone finds the little pieces of happiness and life’s goodness in their own life! What adjustments can you make to better your personal life? As a fellow blogger simply stated:

“you have to take control and make life into what you want it to be.”

Here is an encouraging video by Dr. Becker-Phelps Ph.D/therapist on how we can benefit from thought adjustments in our life and towards our self.  From the Psychology Today article The Good Life: Pause, Observe and Absorb Positives .

*Cover Photo: Via leeaspland.com

The Benefits Of Growing As A Person Through Motherhood And Family Challenges

Family is a huge part of our personal social life, from the most intimate to the absolute strongest bonds. Keeping that life healthy and happy becomes one of the most important things to strive for. Like most parents, I’m always wondering how to manage daily situations differently. What can a parent take into consideration to have a peaceful household? To engage in more family bonding and feel like you are not doing everything wrong. Have you ever felt that way as a mother?

Being lost in motherhood as a new mom, or within blended families, the pressure to be perfect can develop anxiety, worry and stress, leaving family relationships strained. I personally have been there and wanted to get my family into a better place. To have more healthy and happier bonds, as well as grow into the best mother I can be for my own daughter, was a great motivator into discovering change. With effort put into bettering myself and in building understanding, family life has become more cohesive as a mom to a toddler and stepmom to teens. Even my husband and I have grown in our relationship. There has been one greatest discovery I cherish, that imperfections can be beautiful within the family, a safe haven for natural human flaws and the place to learn empathy in a hardened world. 

“Life with children is far from glamorous, but it is so utterly beautiful.” –Rusted Van Photography

So what exactly did I discover?

Take Care of You

First and foremost, the need to take care of myself, be happy with who I am and who I am becoming as a new mother is the main foundation to everything else I have learned. How Taking Care of Yourself Makes you a Better Mom by Kelly Ross, MD, FAAP advises:

“It is so easy to stop caring for yourself or to get overwhelmed. But, when you stop caring for yourself, your ability to care for your child is impacted and your ability to enjoy motherhood is impacted.”

Especially in the first year of new mommy hood, the anxiety and stress to keep up with your growing child, on top of other responsibilities, can become intensely overwhelming at times. Mindfully recognizing how important it is to take care of yourself postpartum and allow rest is vital. It wasn’t till I took daily walks out in the fresh air and allowed myself to just relax or sleep from time to time that I could work on more positive thinking for myself and my family. Opinions and criticism can also be debilitating, only if you allow them. Knowing personal strengths and true heartfelt intentions despite bad days and wrong assumptions, can build up a mother’s self esteem in what she feels is best for her children and family. Gaining better confidence can bring the best out of you as a parent and even benefits brain function for women. Confidence Boosts Women’s Spatial Skills like parking a car, any boost like that for a busy mom is a plus! After believing more in myself, I delved into growing as a person, learning different ways to react to challenges and encouraged more positive thinking.*

Be a Better Person

Another important change was accepting humility to apologize for mistakes and take responsibility. Sometimes we overlook the simple and kind act of apologizing because we are so use to one another within the immediate family, but it can be the very thing needed to alleviate tension and help bad days flow into better ones. Following through in correcting yourself as a parent can be even more important, this has been especially necessary within a step-family, where bonds are not automatically natural. ‘Sorry’ Doesn’t Heal Children’s Hurt but It Mends Relations via Science Daily comments on a study regarding apologizing and making amends:

“Restitution — some sort of active effort to make repairs after a transgression — can make the victim feel better because it may undo some of the harm, and it can repair the relationship by showing the transgressor’s commitment to it,”

I have apologized many times for being imperfect, but most importantly I have strived to learn different ways to approach difficulties and continue to grow and become more mindful as a parent. It is far from easy working on your reactions and showing more understanding when you feel you have to live up to a certain image. It can be accomplished and make a difference, I have experienced it and you can too. Self care plays a key role- as a mother or step-mother, accepting that we can grow from mistakes while continuously trying and giving our best, is proof enough in being a good mom! By doing so, we also provide a model for our young ones to take responsibility for words and actions as they mature, and most importantly, to never give up!

image
Photo via Skyword.com

Empathize

Burnout is a very real part of motherhood and can stem some tough and raw emotions at times. I found this article interesting, How to Give to Others Without Burning Out. As a parent it can be helpful to acknowledge and keep showing empathy despite our challenges. It can lessen the stress you carry, calm not just yourself, but an environment and show understanding towards loved ones. Emma M. Seppälä Ph.D. states:

“When you truly connect with another person who is suffering, you can actually feel empowered and energized, because you are inspired to feel compassion and empathy for that individual. Your worries stop as you become immersed in the goal to be there for another.”

This personally has been a constant work in progress, especially in reprogramming an automatic response to stressors. Dr. Elaine Shpungin, Ph.D., featured on Psychology Today, offers a great method (The PEN Method) that encourages the use of not just mindfulness but empathy when disagreements arise. I have learned to take a step back and pause, to get that few moments breather to not escalate and then remember empathy. Accepting that the current negative feelings of another is only a surface response and that underneath it all there can be a common ground.

Working on empathy is great in accepting negative feelings instead of teaching to hide them or shove them down, our children need to learn ways of mindfulness to gain an ability to reason on the positive not just the negative in their life! Finding ways to benefit myself as a mother to become more self aware and practice more understanding brings a less stressed me and provides a positive example for the rest of the family.

Create a Positive Environment

Take a negative mindset that may be growing within the family and turn it around! I believe trudging through daily complaints with your own positive voice can build a model of resilience for the family. Redirecting negative talk and helping each other find the good in a bad situation can bring positive results. As parents, we have gone through many life experiences and if we have come out a more wise individual because of them, why not teach methods we have gained along the way? Changing how I think has benefited me personally and improved my emotional well being, I also have done my own research on how we can work to turn around our children’s negative self talk and help them build more confidence, it all starts with you as the parent! Self talk and criticisms, be it towards yourself or others, is the very inner voice our children learn. It has been my goal as a mother to keep working on any negativity that shows itself from time to time, and to help encourage more positive perspectives for my family. Now, certain negative feelings are still necessary for a healthy mindset and can help us process through life difficulties, I discuss this in more detail in a previous article post. The goal is to find positive solutions and build resilience towards everyday life.

Finding ways to encourage family time and more openness to communicate is another great way to improve the home environment. This scientific article on eating together as a family gave positive results for teens. What about a game night or movie night? It is a great opportunity for all in the family to feel involved.

“‘More frequent family dinners related to fewer emotional and behavioral problems, greater emotional well-being, more trusting and helpful behaviors towards others and higher life satisfaction,’ says Frank Elgar, an associate professor in the McGill University Faculty of Medicine’s Department of Psychiatry.”

The weeks we have done more together as a step-family has made a difference in our family life, making conversations easier and the ability to discuss problems more calmly, creating better understanding. It is time well worth spending and encourages healthier habits for all in the family!

Family Playing A Board Game Together
Photo via Mabelslabels.com, check out this blog on Family Game nights and grab some ideas.

Parenthood has its challenges and rewards, the beautiful moments and the raw imperfect ones, with great effort we all try to make the best of family life. The lesson I have acknowledged as a parent is the need for personal growth and an ability to adapt healthier habits in the home. The greatest impact in our children’s lives does not only come from what others should or should not be doing, but in what we personally do. When difficulties arise we can model self care, responsibility, empathy and positivity to improve not only ourselves but our family relationships. Being a step-mother has been entirely humbling, and becoming a new mother a wonderful privilege, to continue growing in this adventurous life is a beautiful mindset I wish to share. Being wise is not just proving of what we know or have learned, it is truly accepting personal growth in changing any negative habits for a healthier well being. How much we can truly teach resiliency and capability to our children by doing so! What helps you as a parent? And what personal growth would benefit your own family?

 

*Finding support through postpartum can be a wonderful help for new mothers. Create a supportive network through family and friends or seek out professional therapy or support groups. Postpartum anxiety and depression is real and many mothers can get the support they need to be the best for their children and family.

Cover photo: Alec Mills Photography via WordPress.com

“Take It Easy Momma” – If Only It Was Easy

Being a busy mom is hard work and there have been plenty of times I wish breaks could be possible. With an almost two year old and step-daughters starting school again, driving around and doing errands, housework truly gets mundane and wishing we could just eat out all of the time is a dream. Have you felt caught up in that school rush on top of other responsibilities? I have, and it is wearing my motherly energy down! But, there are positives to the chaos and exhaustion that I daily remind myself.

“Take it easy momma”

It’s a phrase seen more and more in today’s social media and in parenting blogs, and rightfully so. Even for me, I feel the tension and stress build from the nonstop of motherhood that there are days I feel exhausted, and yet keep going, or overwhelmed and get easily frustrated with simple things. Then bam! I have one of those moments that I feel I am just not being myself and take a beautiful step back.  I mean, just let my daughter have a little extra screen time so I can breath and refocus, or grab daddy for an extra hand after dinner to take a warm relaxing shower! The same goes for sleep or getting yourself out for a walk and fresh air. Professionals encourage the time to take care of yourself, like this article on Taking Care of Yourself Makes You a Better Momand it really does! I can get back to wife and mommy duties less stressed out.

“A mom who is well rested, eats a healthy diet, gets plenty of exercise, maintains close relationships with friends and gets help when she realizes she isn’t coping well, is far more equipped to be the best mother she can be than one who doesn’t do those things. It isn’t selfish to take time to exercise or to get an adequate sleep each night.”

It’s the little things mixed with a bit of mind over matter.

Most days it is far from simple to ‘take it easy’, as mothers we are the sole caretaker of our little ones and the main house keeper when we are a stay at home mom. When the function of your home depends on your daily routine, it feels even more overwhelming taking a break from doing that routine. The dishes pile up with the housework, and depending on others doesn’t always panout. So I keep at it all I can, until some reasoning kicks in and I remind myself that it is ok to take a break! Someone else can help with a daily routine and a little mess never hurt anyone. I allow myself to relish in the simple quiet moments that are still existent- some TV time while the toddler naps and everyone else is out of the house or (my most favorite) writing out my next article or blog piece and feeling good doing something I like to do!

Cherish the good moments!

Hearing your, very well onto the terrible twos, toddler screaming at the top of her lungs or throwing more tantrums over what food she will or will not eat can be extremely overwhelming some days. You do your best to stay calm and keep working on different ways to help her learn or express her very hard feelings at this stage, and in only four hours into the day you are exhausted. The work I have put into dwelling on more positive thinking and becoming more mindful, flashes in my mind and I remember to look at all of my daughters everyday accomplishments despite the tantrums. Amongst all the hard work and days, she has managed to start speaking in sentences and is recognizing pictures in books. She loves to draw and with me practicing her letters with her already, she can write the letter ‘A’!image  How much it makes me proud to see not just her everyday growth but my work as a mother! Even sweeter than that is her every day love to cuddle, hug and kiss, bringing me right into the present and slowing down to enjoy it with her. It is worth all the time and energy to discover such beautiful and amazing moments in life!

Are you struggling to keep it together momma’s? If so, find that voice inside of yourself to be ok in allowing a breather for you! Sometimes even other people’s judgements on what we are or are not doing, can get the best of us and stop us from feeling like we deserve to have time to ourselves. Personally, I love delving into my 30’s as a mom, a place in life where you learn to be happy with yourself, living for you and your family not for others. We even have professionals and therapists out there recommending to take those time outs as a mom, it is important to keep being the best wife and mother you can be. I have a healthy, smart and growing daughter, two step daughters growing and becoming wonderful individuals themselves and a great husband who keeps working and doing his best. It can be the hardest responsibility, yet it is all worth it and some personal time well deserved! What little things do you do for yourself as a mother or parent?

 

*Cover photo via bored panda.com

 

The Force Of Optimism VS Our Dark Side: Is There A Balance?

Most people think of Star Wars when it comes to “the force”, but what about in our life? We all carry a dark side to a certain extent and we all can carry the force of light to battle an empire of circumstances! There are many forces in this world, forces within the self, in people’s environment and around social circles. Some are good and healthy positive vibes, others are a bit more negative and heavy to bear. Many learn to find their way around difficult circumstances and difficult people, but a lot of times it becomes more tricky to navigate the positive and negative within the self. 

In a world filled with do’s and don’ts, balance becomes a huge asset when dealing with optimism and pessimism, too much of one can lead to unrealistic expectations and too much of the other can become emotionally destructive to one self and others. This is where, figuratively speaking, the Rebel Alliance of optimism and the Empire of our dark side can come together forming a powerful alliance into healthy thinking! Which force is strong within you? Discover what useful training we all can use to build a better mindset…


Continue reading The Force Of Optimism VS Our Dark Side: Is There A Balance?